Funny Dad Quotes (The Best for Birthdays and Fathers Day)

Are you looking for funny dad quotes for birthdays or Fathers day? A little something to write in that card to make your dad chuckle, and feel just a little more understood? If so, this is the place. Check out the best funny dad quotes, suitable for any occasion!

Dads are good at many things, but unfortunately humour is not always one of them. Despite that, they generally try very hard to make us laugh, and failing that, they usually make themselves laugh!

So what better way to celebrate them on their special day, than by embracing that. Give them what they want. Some humour, some encouragement, and a funny dad quote that resonates with them.

Funny Dad Quotes for this years Fathers Day. image of a dad having fun with his daughter.
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Funny Dad Quotes that are actually rather sweet

A Funny Dad Quote for Birthdays or Fathers Day on a green background with white hearts top and bottom.
A Funny Quote for the special Dad in your life!

Although our Dad’s may like a laugh, they are usually big softies deep down. These quotes are for these lovely Dad’s. Funny and sweet; some dad’s really do have it all.

1. I rescind my early statement, ‘I could never fall in love with a girl who regularly poops her pants.’ I hadn’t met my daughter yet.Dax Shepard

2. A father carries pictures where his money used to be.Steve Martin

3. Dad. He can play like a kid, give advice like a friend, and protect like a bodyguard – Unknown

4. My daughter got me a ‘World’s Best Dad’ mug. So we know she’s sarcastic.Bob Odenkirk

Dad’s Exhausted Quotes

A Humorous Dad Quote for Birthdays or Fathers Day on an orange background with 3 white heart outlines on top left corner and bottom right corner.
A Humorous Quote for Fathers Day or your Dad’s Birthday!

Let’s face it, being a good dad is tiring! If you know an exhausted, worn-out dad, take a look at some of these funny tired dad quotes to make them smile.

5. Remember: What Dad really wants is a nap. Really. Dave Barry

6. Let Sleeping Dads Lie. – Unknown

7. Whenever one of my children says, ‘Goodnight, Daddy,’ I always think to myself, ‘You don’t mean that.’Jim Gaffigan

‘Dad Life’ Quotes

A Funny Quote about being a Father on a green background with dark green handprints, and a paper airplane outline and bunting at the top.
A Dad summing up life with kids!

Life is never the same once you have kids, and for many dads this change comes as a big shock. Take a look at these funny dad quotes where they attempt to sum up the essence of being a dad.

8. You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.Jerry Seinfeld

9. If you’re not yelling at your kids, you aren’t spending enough time with them. Mark Ruffalo

10. Having children is like living in a frat house. Nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.Ray Romano

11. Being a parent involves an unnecessary amount of fake enthusiasm around little kids’ poo being in a toilet.Jim Gaffigan

The Best Dad Quotes for Fathers Day Cards

A Dad Quote to make him laugh this Fathers Day. On a green background, with coloured stars in the top left corner and bottom right corner.
A Funny Fathers Day Quote to pop in a Fathers Day Card.

Fathers Day; that special time of year where we celebrate the important dad, or dad figure, in our lives, and thank him for his commitment to the job! Nobody said we can’t do it with a spot of humour though!

12. Dad, may your Father’s Day be better than your jokes. – Unknown

13. Raising kids may be a thankless job with ridiculous hours, but at least the pay sucks. – Jim Gaffigan

14. The best part of Father’s Day is when your kids buy you something nice with your own money.Unknown

Awesome Dad Quotes for Dad’s Birthday

Funny Happy Birthday Quotes for Dads written on a blue background with white outline of balloons and birthday presents.
A Funny Dad Quote to put in Dads Birthday Card

Looking for a funny quote for your dad on his birthday? I’ve got you covered. Check out these gems!

15. Happy Birthday Dad. Every year I don’t think you could get any more embarrassing but you surprise me every time.Carly Brands

16. Dad, you’ve always been the coolest. Like all those times you said “Yes” when mom said “No.”Unknown

17. I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything till noon. That’s when it’s time for my nap.Bob Hope

18. Dad, you’re proof that the fun doesn’t stop no matter how grey, wrinkly, and incontinent a person gets.Carly Brands

19. With age comes new skills. You can laugh, cough, sneeze, and pee all at the same time.Unknown

The Best Funny Dad Quotes for any Occasion

Dads are special, and Dads with a great sense of humour are simply the best! Even if that humour is just a bunch of recycled ‘dad jokes’, it keeps them happy! Let’s face it, sometimes watching them laugh at how funny they find themselves, is the funniest part! Whatever the occasion, I hope you’ve found something perfect from this list of funny dad quotes for birthdays and Fathers day.

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